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'Harri With An I'

  • Jane Hearst
  • Sep 12, 2017
  • 4 min read

INT. RESTAURANT – EVENING

JAMIE watches as HARRIETT silently laughs in slow motion. The Table light glows against her face, and her hair gently drops as she faces up to look into Jamie’s eyes.

INT. BEDROOM – DAY

Jamie lays on CLAIRE’s bed, gazing at the ceiling, as the muffled sound of Claire’s voice, incoherently rumbles in the background.

INT. RESTAURANT – EVENING

Harriett strokes her hair back behind her ear & lovingly smiles out of the side of her mouth. Sparklers flair behind her as a waiter serves a birthday cake to a child. The flair creates a glowing halo around Harriett’s head.

INT. BEDROOM – DAY

Jamie continues to lay, dazed, in a world of her own, still listening to the sound of sparklers.

CLAIRE

(Recoiling with pain)

Shit!

Jamie awakes from her daze.

JAMIE

What happened?

CLAIRE

Oh good! You ARE still in there

somewhere… at least for emergencies.

Jamie raises an apologetic eyebrow

CLAIRE

Bloody Straighteners, been on the way out

for months, bastards shocked me!

(She walks to her desk)

Who’s this special person that you’re

willing to risk my life for?

(She winks, expectantly)

Jamie blushes with embarrassment and moves away.

JAMIE

Her name’s Harriett Charleston,

I met her a few weeks back during…

Claire opens Harriett’s Facebook profile in the background.

CLAIRE

Aww, she’s cute!

Jamie turns around, confused, to find Claire flicking through facebook photos. She pauses on one…

CLAIRE

At least… I mean… he’s cute.

Jamie frowns, walks over, and the two of them stare at the screen; the comments read “thata boy” “who’s the man!” “looking good mate”.

INT. RESTAURANT – EVENING

HARRY continues to push his fringe back behind his ear & takes a sip from the straw in his drink.

INT. BEDROOM – DAY

JAMIE

Well… that’s… (goes to say “not a problem”)

Claire clicks on the ‘about’ page and it reads ‘male’.

CLAIRE

Tough break on finally finding yourself

the right girl.

JAMIE

Yeah, I guess so

INT. RESTAURANT – EVENING

JAMIE

…I mean I’ve always identified as a…

bisexual… female you know, so…

Jamie looks at Harry and smiles awkwardly. She inhales deeply, with a smile that is beginning to look a little crazy. She looks down at her glass and fumbles, and tries to casually say:

JAMIE

How about you? How do you identify.

HARRY

Oh, I’ve… always liked girls.

Jamie nods with an increasingly desperate smile on her face.

JAMIE

MMM HMM.

Harry reaches out to hold Jamie’s hand, but when she looks closer, she notices how small and feminine it looks. She tilts her head in confusion.

INT. BEDROOM – DAY

JAMIE

Should have worked that out from the Y and…

She points towards the name on the screen

BOTH

…not an I.

(Claire nods in agreement)

Claire continues clicking.

JAMIE

So “Harriett”… I must have just saw the name

and jumped to conclusions, you know cause I thought…

Claire finds something.

CLAIRE

…she was a girl.

Jamie looks downhearted, and walks back over to the bed to sit down.

JAMIE

Yeah.

CLAIRE

No… Jamie… I’m say… HE was a SHE.

JAMIE

What?!

INT. RESTAURANT – EVENING

JAMIE

Though, I guess the better description is

PANsexual… I like boys, girls and…

She smiles awkwardly again.

INT. BEDROOM – DAY

CLAIRE

2012 – long hair, school skirt – girl

2015 – reaches sixth form, cuts hair, wears

sports tops

Then first year of uni… looks like the first semester

the comments start changing.

JAMIE

Fuck!

CLAIRE

What wrong with…? I thought you liked…

JAMIE

There’s… there’s no pronouns here! Is it a she,

a he, a… ze?

CLAIRE

Well they’re certainly not an IT. You need to

calm down, everything will be ok.

JAMIE

No, it won’t.

Oh god, what if I’ve already called her a she

in our chats, when he’s, more likely to be a he.

INT. RESTAURANT – EVENING

HARRI cuts up Jamie, in her sexuality spiel.

HARRI

I have, a, hilarious, story to tell you.

So in my first year right, I went to this

house-party, about… a month or so, into the semester,

and I see this guy called John that I’ve been

hanging around with.

Jamie nods along with the story.

HARRI cont.

Guy’s talking to my housemate about the hilarious

boy that he lives with. Now the only other guy in

our apartment, is this dude called Taylor, and

he NEVER comes out of his room. So my housemate

George is all confused… dude points at me doesn’t he.

Me?!

Harri looks offended, then bursts out laughing.

HARRI cont.

Can you believe that! he thought that I was a

boy! and I mean he so sure, he was willing to bet

on it!

Jamie laughs, but she does so a little too late.

HARRI

You’re right boring story. You’ll get it when

you meet them.

JAMIE

Do you know… I mean… you know that your

facebook says you’re a boy right.

HARRI

What really?! Bastards! No wonder…

She looks up to Jamie.

HARRI cont.

You thought I was a boy.

She smiles mischievously. Jamie looks in horror.

JAMIE

No, I knew… well I thought I knew… at least before

I saw…

The sounds of the room get louder as Jamie feels trapped and embarrassed.

HARRI

You really are adorable.

Jamie is caught off guard.

JAMIE

what?

Harri smiles, and leans towards her, gazing into her eyes with intrigue. Jamie nervously smiles back, fumbling with her clothes. The moment holds, the two laugh…

The end.

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